Managing and Preventing Temper Tantrum in Kids
What is Tantrums?
Tantrums are one of the most widespread
forms of problematical behavior in
young children, but tend to decrease
in occurrence and intensity as the child grows older. For the toddler,
"tantrums are normal...the force of the tantrum is a kind of evaluation of
the strength of character the child
can possess eventually, if he's helped to harness
that energy".
While tantrums may be seen as a forecaster
of future anti-social behavior, in
another sense they are simply 'a demonstration
of a loss of control and frustration that
your child doesn't have the capacity to deal with—yet'; and so 'with endurance
and a reliable reaction to tantrums, they'll get fewer and farther between as
your child grows'.
Some people who have neurological
disorders such as autism or logical disability could be more flat to tantrums
than others, when it happens, they throw themselves on the floor, crying, shattering
and kicking as a means of getting across that things are "not right",
although anyone experiencing brain damage (temporary or permanent) can suffer
from tantrums. Anyone may be prone to tantrums once in a while, regardless of
gender or age.
What
causes temper tantrum in toddlers?
A toddler's view of the world is self-centered; "I want what I
want, when I want it!" This conceited view of their world is tied with an
incomplete and unhinged development of communicative language skills when
compared with their more complete accessible language skills. The receptive
language of a 2-year-old child is numbered in the thousands, while the
expressive skill generally is 150-200 words. Perhaps more frustrating for the
toddler is the accessible ability to understand complex sentence structure
while being able to express his thoughts in two- to three-word phrases.
The toddler world is full of examination and discovery. Commonly, young children learn by verifying and
attempting the same or related task. This (from a parental perspective) is fine
when it comes to desired behaviors (such as toilet training). However, playing
with the TV remote control is not part of these desired behaviors, unless you
are a toddler and don't discriminate with regard to goals. When a parent's
desire for safety and limiting chaos clashes with their young child's struggle for autonomy and limited language capabilities, the temper tantrum is
almost certain
Because of your child's growing
desire to assert his/her independence, this stage is often called the "terrible twos." However, this can
be an exciting time for you and your toddler. He will experience huge
intellectual, social, and emotional changes that will help him to explore his
new world, and make sense of it.
What Triggers Tantrum?
Some children are more prone to
tantrums, particularly kids who are forceful, agitated, or changeable, or kids
who don't adjust well to new environments. For most toddlers, tantrums are
simply a way of getting out their frustration and testing limits (Will mommy
buy me that toy if I scream really loud?).
Parents can effectively manage
temper tantrums by remaining calm and objective and not rewarding the child's
behavior. Walking away from the child during the temper tantrum teaches the
child that their approach is unsuccessful. Timeout is also an effective tool
parents can successfully utilize.
Strategies exist to help prevent
temper tantrums. Realistic behavioral expectations, letting the child make some
choices in day-to-day activities, and searching out and rewarding good behavior
choices are all effective techniques.
Extremely frequent and
excessively long-lasting (greater than five minutes) tantrums involving
violence (especially directed at younger siblings or other children) or
parental sense of "loss of control" warrant an appointment with the
child's pediatrician.
How to prevent tantrum in kids?
You're standing in the snack passageway
of the supermarket. Lying at your feet is your toddler, who has just been
informed (by you) that, no, she cannot have the Cinderella fruit snacks. Her
face has turned gloominess somewhere between red and purple. Her fists are
pounding the floor in rage as she
emits a shriek that can be heard in the farthest reaches of the parking lot.
The other shoppers are yawning at
this spectacle as you wish badly for
a hole to open in the floor and swallow you up.
Many a parent has been through a
scenario like this, although the tantrum might have taken a slightly different
form; crying, hitting, kicking, stomping, throwing things, and breath
holding are all popular tantrum techniques.
Temper tantrums are extremely common in children,
especially between ages 1 and 4 -- the early part of which is sometimes called
the "terrible 2s" -- when kids are still learning how to communicate
effectively. More than half of young children will have one or more tantrums a
week as they vent their frustrations and displeasure their lack of control.
Although they are a normal part
of the toddler repertoire, temper tantrums can be distressing to parents. When
they occur infrequently, tantrums aren't a big deal and are best ignored. It's
when they become regular or intense that parents need to look into what's
causing them and find ways to stop them…
Although "when a child is in
a tantrum, it is all too obvious that it is wanting something, badly wanting
it...what the child is also needing is something very different ... for someone
to provide a parental firmness that can help the child to cope with frustration
that is age-appropriate".
Selma Fraiberg warned against
"too much pressure or forceful methods of control from the outside"
in child-rearing: "if we turn every instance of pants changing, treasure
hunting, napping, puddle wading and garbage distribution into a governmental
crisis we can easily bring on fierce defiance, tantrums, and all the fireworks
of revolt in the nursery".
Some people who have neurological
disorders such as autism or logical disability could be more flat to tantrums
than others, when it happens, they throw themselves on the floor, crying, shattering
and kicking as a means of getting across that things are "not right",
although anyone experiencing brain damage (temporary or permanent) can suffer
from tantrums. Anyone may be prone to tantrums once in a while, regardless of
gender or age
How Prevent Tantrum?- Video.
You're standing in the snack
aisle of the supermarket. Lying at your feet is your toddler, who has just been
informed (by you) that, no, she cannot have the Cinderella fruit snacks. Her
face has turned a shade somewhere between red and purple. Her fists are
pounding the floor in fury as she emits a shriek that can be heard in the
farthest reaches of the parking lot. The other shoppers are gaping at this
spectacle as you wish desperately for a hole to open in the floor and swallow
you up.
Many a parent has been through a
scenario like this, although the tantrum might have taken a slightly different
form; crying, hitting, kicking, stomping, throwing things, and breath holding
are all popular tantrum techniques.
What is Tantrum?- Video
Temper tantrums are exceedingly
common in children, especially between ages 1 and 4 -- the early part of which
is sometimes called the "terrible 2s" -- when kids are still learning
how to communicate effectively. More than half of young children will have one
or more tantrums a week as they vent their frustrations and protest their lack
of control.
Although they are a normal part
of the toddler repertoire, temper tantrums can be distressing to parents. When
they occur infrequently, tantrums aren't a big deal and are best ignored. It's
when they become regular or intense that parents need to look into what's
causing them and find ways to stop them.
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